Tag Archives: writing

A Watched Pot…

Leave a reply

…never boils. I used that expression on a 4th grader at my son’s school the other day, while he was waiting for his disagreeably slow computer to boot up in the lab. I had to explain the expression to  him, its (accurate) assertion that the more attention you focus on something for which you are waiting, the longer it seems to take to arrive. He listened politely to my explanation, then went right back to staring intently at the screen, body tensed and quivering with the stress of his watching, hand poised to lightning-click the minute the monitor showed any signs of life.

I am, apparently, no more patient than a 4th grader.

If you read my last post, you know that I have been waiting for news of my application to grad school. No news is yet forthcoming, so I have begun spending part of each day (I decline to disclose  just how large a part) obsessively checking each of my e-mail accounts, meticulously combing through even the junk mail, in search of a reply.  

I’ve even taken to checking the program web site, in hopes that at least there might be a mass message posted there: “We’ve already sent out the acceptance letters, so if you haven’t heard back from us yet, give up now–you won’t.”

There was a mass update posted there on at least one of the times I checked, advising applicants that now (since the “late February” deadline had come and gone) they could expect word of their status sometime “in early March.”

That made me feel so much better, because now I can stop asking the question “When will I get my rejection letter?” and obsess instead about questions such as “What does early March mean? Does it mean the 8th? When do they start calling it mid-March–the 15th? That would be halfway through the month, approximately, wouldn’t it?”

Sigh. And I had promised myself that this year, I’d behave myself better about this waiting thing.

But apparently, I’m no better than a 4th grader.

Here we go again…

Leave a reply

It’s late February again, which can only mean one thing:  I am, once again, awaiting word on my application to grad school. The customary pall of dread I carry around with me this time of year seems a little lighter this time around, for some reason; perhaps it’s just that I’ve gotten so practiced at being rejected that I’ve come to expect it.

Friends and family alike have gamely offered their comfort and support, particularly along the lines of the whole “The third time’s the charm” approach, but I have never attached much credence to the “Three is a magic number” philosophy; the only magic involving the number three for me has been that that is the number of children I have–a case in which the number three has resulted in approximately equal parts magic and chaos, in my opinion.

I think my yearly admissions-angst is also tempered this year by a small amount of annoyance: the program web site does, in fact, state that applicants should receive word by “late February.” Waiting until the 28th, in my opinion at least, takes that statement a bit too literally.

On the other hand, the very real possibility that only those who are being rejected are being made to wait until the very last day of the month for notification has not escaped my attention. After all, the university will only have to send out 12 acceptance letters, but if past years are any indication, they’ll have upwards of 400 rejections to send out–in their position, I’d probably be dragging my feet, too.

So what is next for me? Well, once the formal notification arrives, I’ll have to make a decision about the whole self-publication thing. (Is it too obvious what I believe my notification letter will contain?) Those in favor of self-publication argue that there is no shame in it, citing the names of many famous authors who went that route (Thoreau, Whitman, Twain); purists in the other camp remain unconvinced. Somewhere in the middle is me, and a “mentoring press” that has agreed to publish my novel.

This press does not accept every manuscript they receive (only 1 of 9 are accepted), which makes me feel a little better about it. And I do believe in my book, and that it’s worth publishing and worth reading. But there is still a squeamish little purist worming little holes of doubt into the darker recesses of my mind, whispering that maybe I just haven’t found the right agent yet, or that this submission will be The One.

It’s sort of my thinking that if the university says no, then perhaps it’s time to say yes to the press–but I haven’t reached that point yet.

On the other hand, it is already “late February”, so a decision will be coming soon.

What do you all think about self-publishing? I’d love to know…

You can’t get too high…

Leave a reply

Well, here we go again: another week of so many tantalizingly possible ups, I’m almost certain to come crashing down for one (or more) enormous downs. Hey, everyone–please allow me to introduce our guest blogger for the day, Eeyore! 

Okay, here’s the scoop: First, I heard back from a highly-respected local mentoring press’ Acquisitions Editor that they would be delighted to publish my book. That is exciting news, of course, since this particular press does only publish 1 out of every 9 submissions it receives, they are an award-winning press, and the books I’ve seen are all very high quality. It was definitely balm for my writer’s ego to spend some time reading the editor’s critique and fantasize about moving forward with the process, but I’m just not there yet.

A mentoring press is still, after all, a type of self-publishing, even if this one is more selective than most about its authors, not to mention that it would still cost a pretty chunk of change to get the job done. I’m not dismissing it–just pondering it at the moment.

Then, out of the blue, I received a moving thank-you last week from someone who had read a health-related article of mine from a couple of years ago which prompted them to see a doctor and led to an accurate diagnosis of the individual’s very rare condition. I mean, wow–how much more of a difference in the world can you hope to make in the world as a writer than to, well, sort of, save someone’s life? After that, publication seems sort of secondary.

But only sort of. Because then I participated in a webinar with a literary agent earlier this week, part of which included submitting my first three pages for a critique. After the spate of recent rejections, a critique was all I expected, but on the strength of those three pages, the agent requested a partial review of 30 pages! Again, she could get to page 29 and decide, “Bleh, that’s enough for me,”, but just having had someone ask always feels good.

And then, on that “real job” front: just when I least expected it, I got an e-mail requesting an interview with me for a job I applied to a couple of weeks ago–I was hoping it might be a good enough fit to actually speak with a live human being about it, but given that I’ve sent out dozens of applications over the last year without a single interview being granted, this was a pretty exciting development.

So to recap: thank you from grateful reader; acceptance for publication by mentoring press; request for a partial from a bona fide literary agent; and job interview later this week (and it’s even for something I don’t think I would actually hate doing every day!)

Oh, and of course, my beloved Chicago Bears won this past weekend–it doesn’t get much better than this, does it?

Um, no–and that’s precisely what has me worried now. Stay tuned, everyone.

It’s Been A While…

Leave a reply

Wow, I must have been having a lot of fun for the past few months, because I cannot believe I haven’t posted anything new since–what was that, July? Egad.

Yes, the time has flown–I just wish I could remember what I was doing that was so much fun it kept me from blogging all this time. On the other hand, maybe it’s better that I can’t–it probably wasn’t that much fun.

So, it’s the shiny New Year, which means it’s get-back-on-track time (again). I wouldn’t necessarily use the word “resolution”, but I do seem to get a firmer sense of resolve around this time every year–equal parts guilt and shame over not having accomplished more than I did the previous year, I suspect.

What’s on the docket for this year? Well, other than trying to get rid of my “writer’s butt” (if you’re a writer, you know what I’m talkin’ ’bout), right now, I’m updating my blog, so I can check that off my list (yes, I actually did write that one down). I spent the morning working on an article for a newsletter; spent the early afternoon in a Webinar about how to get an agent (yes, I’m still looking); and I just finished working on a writing grant-proposal (note the hyphen there–I do write grant proposals, but this is a grant for writing. Kind of confusing, I know.)

And then, of course, there is my annual “Will-she-or-won’t-she-finally-be-accepted-to-grad-school?” drama coming up in the next month or so. You’d think I would’ve given up by now, but what can I say, I’m a masochist. I worked up new samples, secured a couple of new letters of recommendation, deleted the “Excuses for my Poor Math Grades” essay and got it in just barely by the deadline (along with, she said indignantly, the greatly increased application fee). I think you should get a refund of the fee if they reject you more than once.

As for longer-range plans, I am finally beginning my search for a “real” job. Since I’ve apparently never held one of those (teaching didn’t count, I guess), I assume that that means doing something I hate for a minumum of 6-8 hours every day; probably having to drive at least an hour each day for the pleasure of doing it; and the thrill of coming home at the end of each day tired, crabby, and unfulfilled–at least, that’s what I’ve heard. Oh, and no Social Security benefits when I retire because the Baby Boomers will use them all up. (I’ve heard that, too.) Can’t wait!

Oh, come on, you folks who know me know me better than to think I’m a Debbie Downer like that–I’m just pulling your legs with all that Bad Attitude stuff. I’m actually kind of looking forward to working outside of the house again (“kind of”–I’m all about hedging my bets). After a few months of reporting to work in pajamas, you start to feel a bit slovenly (even though I just got some really sweet new pajamas for Christmas.)

So, that’s my docket for now. How will that affect my writing? Well, I’ll still do it–it’ll just take a little longer to get to stuff (says she who took 6 months to get around to updating her blog.)

If you really like me, you’ll wait…

See you in June!

Just kidding.

Ups and Downs…

Leave a reply

One of my new favorite songs to warm up to on my runs is “Tippin’ on the Tightrope” by Janelle Monae. There’s a section of the lyrics that seems particularly fitting as I work toward my writing goals:

“You can’t get too high/You can’t get too low/’Cause if you get too high/No, you’ll surely be low”

The last couple of months have been a period of quite a few highs and lows for me, to be sure. After accepting what felt like my 500th rejection notice, I was feeling pretty low and thinking about updating my resume to start looking for a “real” job. Down.

Then one of my freelancing roles suddenly expanded, bringing me a bit more steady work. Up.

I was turned down for acceptance to grad school–again. Definite Down. But, just this morning, I read in the local paper that, due to tough financial times, the university in question “admitted the smallest class to its Graduate School this decade”, accepting nearly 100 fewer students this year. Okay, so not a true Up, but it did make me feel better to think that it wasn’t just me who got the shaft from the Admissions Office–there were a whole lot of us out there.

However, feeling better about it doesn’t change the fact that I wasn’t accepted. Um, yeah. Down.

But then an agent whom I’d queried months ago (and who, I must confess, is the one agent with whom I’d most like to work) contacted me and requested a partial review of my revised manuscript. Way Up.

And then today, two rejection slips: one for a short story I’d submitted and the other for an article I’ve been shopping around for a few months. Back Down.

Up, Down, Up, Down.

Is this what life in a “real” job would be like, I wonder? There’s certainly a respectable amount of appeal in a job that would come with a steady paycheck and reduced mood swings, I think. So I wonder.

Sometime this next month, if the agent’s estimate is accurate, I expect to hear back from her. Will it be Up (a full manuscript read)? Or will it be Down (No, thanks, even less interested this time around)?

Also this month, I expect to receive word on my status in The Loft Literary Center’s Mentor Series Competition. I’ve applied before: In 2008, I made it into the top 20 (big Up), but only the top 12 were accepted. (Need I say more?) I did submit for both the fiction and creative nonfiction categories this time, so hopefully that doubled my chances, but who knows? Up. Down.

Yep. Who knew making a go of this was going to require so much intestinal fortitude? It’s enough to make a lesser woman seasick.

Fortunately, I’m not a lesser woman. Hang on, I’ll be right back (it’s time for me to spin around in my chair a few more times.)